3/19/09

Muslims are not Good in Bed


Those last posts were downers, but then I found this. Click on that link and see if you can read it without laughing. Go ahead, I dare ya. Or just take it from me, it's ok to be naked when you screw.

Muslims and sex, man, you don't know whether to laugh or cry. Here's a site with advice on the islamic equivalent of foreplay. I LOL'ed:

“When a Muslim man is about to enter his wife, he should always say first ... “In the name of Allah, O Allah, keep us away from the devil, and keep the devil away from that which You may grant us (ie. Offspring).”
Can you picture it? Interrupting the height of passion to make a speech like that? It'd make anybody go dry and limp—way to kill the mood, buddy. And then you gotta take a bath as soon as you're done (whenever that is), so no falling asleep in your lover's arms and waking up with nibbles. Forget multiple orgasms, too, because when a guy “comes to his wife and then wishes to return another time” he needs to take a bath first. They can have the big water bills, I'll stay in bed till we both look like glazed donuts.

I swear, if that's all these guys are aiming for I don't know why they even bother. Status Quo brings us more levity here.

4 comments:

PersonalFailure said...

Apparently, "the devil" is an orgasm, because I don't see how you could break concentration long enough to say that, and then get right back into the mood.

If everything is going as it should be, I can't remember my name by that point.

uzza said...

LOL. "the devil is an orgasm" I am so going to use that, somewhere, for something.

"You and me
and the devil makes three,
don't need no other
lovin' deee-i-ty"

(tune of Go to Sleep Little Baby)

Anonymous said...

the devil referred to aint an orgasm LOL
jus sayin make any kdis u have b good .. but yeh, who would even REMEMBER 2 say that? :S lol

Anonymous said...

You all are a bunch of nobs dont know shit ask your sister once tou go black you dont go back. your nobs are so small your mum helps you to take a piss........